Becoming Successful in Life

Do you want Perfection ? ? Think Before you Answer

2011-06-13T20:04:00.001-07:00

Very Often we find ourselves depressed for not being better. We detest ourselves for not being as intelligent as our colleague, capable as our boss, qualified as a friend, smart as our spouse, rich as our neighbour and even lucky as a sibling. We compare with others and crave for being better as someone at something. Whenever we reflect on our life from various dimensions its natural that we find some one better than us or we come in face with our inaility to meet our own standards. In other words, we fail to be what we think is perfect and keep grieving over it.

Don Miguel Ruiz in his book “The Four Agreements” says our image of perfection is the reason “we reject ourselves – the way we are – and why we don’t accept others the way they are.”

But in reality there is no point where we say “yes, this is perfect.” Perfection is an illusion and is driven by one’s ego. To say that something is perfect means that it is flawless. But this is nothing but overlooking negative realities. Therefore perfection is impractical, however hard our minds wants to convince us otherwise. We conclude that we are not perfect by counting our failures. We measure our success with respect to others and belittle it. While assessing our success and worth we don’t assign any value to what we have learnt from a failure.Also we don’t compare what we are now with what we are earlier. We fail to consider how in the first place it is possible to reach perfection without failing, learning and improving.

Striving for perfection is attempting to remove our defects or hiding them. In essence it is denying ourselves. Instead, we should focus on what we call “wholeness”. It can guide support and actually make a difference. Wholeness is all inclusive of our life. If it talks about the importance of doing things right to succeed it also tells about taking risks and exploring options. Perfection drags our attention to what went wrong or is imperfect. Wholeness helps discover what our shortcomings can teach us. It helps us realise that flaws and imperfections are eminently necessary and useful so that we value and cherish every moment and experience.

Striving for perfection also exhausts us because we lose connection with our self and get lost in the process of adapting to an unrealistic personality. So the moment we encounter negative feelings and emotions that entail this attempt, we should stop and introspect to identify our true self. At this stage when we calm down and explore our inner selves, we understand the sense and significance of wholeness. We gain the courage to accept ourselves.

Feeling ashamed of flaws and trying to deny them affects suffering. We begin to reject ourselves and develop destructive behaviour. But when we embrace them, we develop compassion, empathy and tolerance. This way we not only improve our lives but also support others in relieving themselves from their suffering. Finally, Attaining perfection is an idealistic attempt and does no good when forced upon one self. Instead the pursuit of wholeness is more practical and rewarding.

What Do You Think Of ? ? Do you Like to be a Perfectionist ? ? Do you Strive for Perfection or Wholeness ? ?

Photo Credit : anonymousfatgirl

Lessons to Learn from Cricket World Cup 2011

2011-06-09T19:39:00.001-07:00

Hope you have read my previous post about restart of my blogging activity. To be honest I have no idea what should be my 1st post after restarting my blogging activity. After a lot of brain storming I recalled that the history has been repeated after 28years. India had won the prestigious ICC Cricket world cup 2011. Being an Indian I'm proud that “Men in Blue” won the World Cup. But its not an easy way for them. At each and every stage they fought the battle as if it was the final match. Thinking deeper about the world cup i found out something interesting which can be related to our lives to achieve success in personal as well as our professional lives. So i thought why not write a post on this ? Because “The Dream of a Billion Hearts Came True”.

Cricket is like a religion in some countries. If the theme of a religion is human wellness then lets see what we can learn from this religion and how we can relate it with our lives.Lets go back into the past i.e. the days of world cup and check out..

Leadership

The first and foremost thing to be successful in a team. A good leader should be able to use the available resources effectively because the resources which we need many not be available always. He should be able to mingle and move along with the team members by leading them. “A great bowler can’t do anything if the fielding is poor. But if the fielding is good a common bowler can be an extra ordinary bowler.” This shows if one need to achieve the co-operation of team members is essential. similarly in an organization if all work collectively then results can be achieved. This not only helps for the organizational growth but also for Individual growth.

Profitability

In cricket “A Run Saved is a Run Made.” If the fielders stop the runs by fielding well the pressure on batsman will be reduced. Applying the same in our lives “ A Rupee saved is a Rupee Earned”. Similarly in an organization if we can stop the unnecessary costs the profitability increases. The same rule applies for a family too. The pressure on the chief earner in a family decreases if we avoid spending money for unnecessary things.

Over Coming the Obstacles

In Cricket, The goal of the Opponent is to get the batsman on strike.No batsman gets the chance of setting his own field or bowling done by the bowler of his choice.Similarly in our life the situations may not favor us always. We should always try to achieve our goal despite of the obstacles like Financial Boundaries, Unexpected Keepers, Difficulties in form of Fielders e.t.c. The only thing to get succeeded from this is continuous updating of ourselves with Practice. Players will do continuous practice despite of having a match or not. Similarly a person should always be well prepared from the beginning it self.

Hard Work and Commitment

Hard Work and Discipline are the important steps for Success. The classic example for this is “Yuvraj Singh” who became the man of the tournament. Though he haven’t been in good form before world cup , he became the most important player for Indian Team in the world cup. This is because of hard work and practice . Though there are many talented people in the teams that participated in earlier world cups, compared to this team the only thing lagging in them is change in attitude. “We can Achieve any thing” is the attitude that is essential for success.

Planning and Implementation

Having a perfect plan is not alone enough for achieving success. But we need perfect implementation of it. The plan should also be flexible so that changes can be made to it whenever necessary.

Time is Precious

In this world we may bring back any thing but not TIME. A batsman who can’t reach the crease in time will loose his chance of playing further. We need to start things in right time to reach our goal in specified time.

Making Decisions

In Cricket, the batsman doesn’t play the ball keeping the bowler in mind. Rather he plays his shot depending on the ball. Similarly in life before deciding on a suggestion don’t keep the person in mind but think of the suggestion.If its good and beneficial implement it else discard it.

Making a Century in a Match doesn’t mean that the batsman can start from 101 in the next match. He needs to start from 0 again. Don’t get carried away by small achievements. To achieve something big you need a continuous hard work and dedication.

Finally, “Don’t Run on a misfield” is a principle in cricket which most of them don’t know. This shows that don’t try to exploit others mistakes and get benefitted from them.

What Do You think Of ? ? Please Share your Opinion? ?

photo credit : Bharat Chronicle , cric-worldcup

Restart… Hope its Needed Again

2011-06-07T19:45:00.000-07:00

Hi all, Hope everyone’s is fine and doing well. First of all my sincere apologies for not posting or replying you these days. It’s almost a year since i had posted here. The main reason for not being able to post is being busy with my MBA classes. The Hectic schedule of mine haven’t let me post up any thing here. Anyways now I'm almost done with my 1st year of MBA. I wish i could get some time during my 2nd year to continue my blogging activity.

My 1st year of my MBA has taught me many things. In my further posts I'll be sharing with you all those experiences which will definitely let you go back to your college days if you already completed your education or will make you wait for those days to come if you are still pursuing your studies.I welcome you to share your ideas and your experiences so that we all can have some benefit along with fun here.

Coming to the title of the post “Restart… Hope its needed again”,

since i want start my blogging activity again, I have been thinking about the title for the post what could be the better one ? some thoughts came to mind such as I’m back, Back Again, Rebounce e.t.c. at one point i thought of Restart, i don’t know whether its apt or not but decided to start writing with that title. When typing the post i thought of “Restart”.

“Is a Restart really needed in Life ? ?” The answer which my mind gave me is “YES”

Why will be the following question ?

At one point or the other of our lives we wish to restart again. In fact we’ll be doing that too. We have been said that “Learn from your Mistakes and Take Care that You won’t Repeat them”. Let it be Personal or Professional Life unfortunately some mistakes will create a mess, from where we need to start again from scratch and start redoing. That's the Restart I’m talking about. Restarting here means the “Hope” which we are having on future by doing the same things in a different way. If we are not willing to Restart there itself our growth stops. Restarting also means Changing along with the environment around us. Most of us know that the environment around us is dynamic and one who is not willing to change can’t sustain and survive in the competition. We have seen many organizations resisting to change are no more.

Now i hope that all of you agree with me that Restart is needed again and again in life. That’s why i have added “Hope its Needed again in the title”

PhotoCredit: applicationsnokia

What Do You think Of Restart? ? Please Share your experiences if you have any ? ?

Do You Think Before Making Promises ? ?

2010-06-14T01:02:00.001-07:00

Let me start this post with an interesting story developed on characters from the epic Mahabharata. Dharmaraja, the elder of the pandavas was known for his honesty,and commitment and for not telling a lie even once in his lifetime.While gambling with his cousin, he lost everything in betting and as per the agreement between them he has to spend 12years in forest and another year in disguise along with his four brothers and his wife.

It was the last day of their camouflaged life in jungles. As they were preparing to return to their kingdom, a beggar bowed before the raja and asked for help. “Come Tomorrow.I promise to give whatever you want” said the erstwhile king.Overhearing this Bheema (one among raja’s four brothers) went on the top of a hill and started shouting to the five elements ( According to Hindu mythology the five elements Earth,Fire,Water,Air and Sky ,that are needed for a human being to live are termed as Panchabhutas). “Listen! Here is a chance of my brother lying for the first time in his Life. “ Surprised Dharmaraja asked him the reason.

Bheema politely replied, “What is the affirmation that you would be the king by tomorrow ? How were you so sure that both of you will live till you accomplish your promise ? What is the guarantee that the beggar would remain as a beggar till tomorrow?.” The morale from the story is “Making Promises is not Important but fulfilling the promise is the Important Thing..”

Promise Management

Many of us give importance to Time,Stress management,Emotional balance etc but somehow do not give due significance to developing the habit of keeping promises.Promise Management is the foundation for character management.Promises may keep the relationships,but non-performance will turn them into enemies.Being trustworthy is a consistent process of choosing someone else’s interests over your own.

“Assure only what you can deliver and deliver more than what you assured” is an old proverb.But unfortunately we promise according to our hopes and perform according to realities.

“Don’t promise too much” is the 1st suggestion given to the newly married couples.Never make a promise to your spouse or lover that you cannot keep, no matter how much pressure you feel,no matter how much critical the situation may be.When you cannot carry out you may have to lie and you know that one lie leads to another.Its like throwing today’s problem into tomorrows court.We act exactly the same when we make an impossible promise.

False Promises

Do everything meet your word ? But when that becomes impossible, admit your inability at the earliest rather than due date.Instead of luring the creditor with the false promises and irritating him with rounds around you,commit the next exact date.Don’t lie to avoid the crisis and to get temporary solace.One Lie is the mother of next hundred lies.

Avoid False Promises

Relationships are built on trust and and commitment, but unfortunately many people take their friends and spouse granted.A small lie about a purchase or a cover up for a forgotten birthday takes up a bite of their confidence and over years the foundation of trust begins to crumble.If somebody is promising paradise on earth, consider that he is going to create hell for you.On the other side,if you find that you are regularly breaking promises either on your punctuality or in financial reasons analyse the reasons for your attitude.

A broken promise suggests 3 things

1. The person to whom you promised is not a priority in your scheme of such things..

2. Within a limitless time of approval, you are trying to please too many people beyond your capacity.

3. You do not perceive your promise important enough to be kept.

No person in this world is busy.Rather we only have different priorities..

A promise kept is a pleasure that draws appreciation from others, whereas broken promise leads to resentment, anxiety, hate and distrust.Promptness in keeping up your promises will enhance your creditworthiness and hence give margin of error while fulfilling date as unexpected difficulties may surface.

PhotoCredit: versimark

What Do You think Of ? ? Are you a Promise Keeper Or Promise Breaker ? ? ?

Are You Creative ? ? Be Careful

2010-06-11T01:56:00.001-07:00

Its been almost a week, i haven’t written any post.First of all i apologize for this.Its because of being a bit busy with my family functions,tours (need to go to places where net wasn’t available). Also i have done a couple of guest posts. So i was unable to write anything.

The Problem with creative people is they like to do creative things. Throughout history, they have tormented mankind with the prolific use of their brain cells. They began by creating guns and then went on to make nuclear missiles. And as if that wasn't enough destruction, they invented domestic appliances.

There is a reason why we are so acerbic about the whole thing. Guns are okay so long as they are not pointed at anybody in particular. Nuclear missiles can be tolerated under 20 feet of Siberian snow. But domestic appliances? There is simply no excuse for that. We could have forgiven those creative monsters for making so much of an apple falling on their heads, but the conception of the vacuum cleaner is absolutely reprehensible. Honest, hard working housewives who used to have the time of their lives mopping floors and washing dishes are now deprived of their daily pleasures, and have turned into bored slatternly scalawags, thanks to this creation of devious minds.

Although there is an infinitesimal segment of the world's population who would like to believe otherwise, creativity is a curse, not a blessing. It is the cause of all the world's troubles. Even offices have not been spared. Like a contagion that has reached epidemic proportions, every office has its bunch of infected workers. Every so often, they come up with new ways to improve productivity, design new products or build new equipment, leaving little gasping space for ordinary people or little chance for them to cope with. So here are some of the things need to be considered before implementing a new idea, so that it reaches to each and every one..

Stifle artistic tendencies

A lot of these creative types tend to be artistic. They usually like to play around with norms and see if they can bend the rules to add an artistic flourish to their work. Make it clear that you won't stand for this kind of tomfoolery.

Red-Tape

What would the world do without it? If, perchance, anybody should come up with a creative idea, ensure that they have to get it signed, attested and ratified by at least fifteen people, including the invisible housekeeping staff, in different parts of the office building before they bring it to your notice.

Conform, I say

Creative people usually have their own way of functioning and are extremely possessive about it. So, the easiest way to stop their onslaught is to ban anything they find comforting. If they like to put up pictures of Jimmy Hendrix or Einstein, take care to inform them that it is against company policy to brandish pictures of anyone other than the boss. Also, strategically place maniacal `Big Brother is watching you' posters around the water-cooler.

To be or not to be

Whoever came up with the concept of delegating decision-making was a lazy brute. Not only is it harmful and dangerous, it is plain silly. The idea is to accord all decision-making capabilities to the top level of management and make rubber stamps out of the rest of the company's employees.

Isolate the Philistines

Do not, by any chance, include them or ask them to participate in any grand scheme the company wishes to undertake. Give them monotonous tasks to accomplish and leave them in the dark about what the aims and objectives of the project are. Was it Confucius who once said it is always safe to let your left hand be unaware of what your right is doing? Or maybe it was Richard Nixon. In either case, it is a sound theory that has stood the test of time.

Reward incompetence

Surely, the best way to curb that painful creative impulse is to hand the apple to the slob who sits at his desk twiddling his thumbs all day and to regard with disdain the pencil-necked geek who chirps about arcane things like quality and productivity. In all cases, seniority must be the benchmark for reward, not ability. One of the great, or perhaps the only great thing about creativity is it can so easily be delightfully corrupted. Thomas Alva Edison made the light bulb after two years of failed attempts, but it takes only one bungling electricity board employee to shut off the power of an entire region. Who is more powerful? We leave it to you to decide.

photo credit : alwaysnewmistakes

Let us Know What Do you Think of ? ?

3D Approach For Success In Life – A New Meaning for an old fable

2010-06-03T03:13:00.001-07:00

All of us know the old tale of Hare and The Tortoise.But when we observe the story carefully it shows us an approach for being successful in life.Here’s the new direction to look in the story and achieve success in life.

The 1st D stands for Destination

The Hare challenged the tortoise.Tortoise accepted the challenge.knowing fully well its own limitations why did the tortoise accepted the challenge ? Hare took it as a race. Tortoise took it as a journey towards the Destination.

The 2nd D stands for Direction

Hare looked behind at the competitor.Tortoise can’t be seen anywhere near.But Tortoise looked ahead towards the destination.It had right Direction.It moved ahead with commitment.

The 3rd D stands for Determination

The hare was proud of its own performance compared to its competitor.Soon it became tired and complacent.The result was deep slumber.Tortoise went ahead unmindful of hare’s behavior at its own place in the right direction towards the destination with Determination.

Tortoise was the winner who accomplished its declared purpose by adopting 3 D approach – Destination, Direction, Determination.

The morale here to take from the story is

1. Always look at your goal as the destination you have to reach at any cost. So that you need to plan according to reach your destination.

2. Try to move in the right direction to achieve your goal with commitment.i.e. never get distracted from your goal for any reason.Stay focused on your goal.

3. Unless you reach your goal don’t feel you are tired. Being determined to achieve the goal will give you the necessary energy to move further to achieve success..

Anyone can become winner with this 3d approach by looking at the destination approaching it in right direction with determination.

photo credit : hickerphoto

What do you think of ? ?

Dealing Successfully with Negotiations

2010-05-30T02:43:00.001-07:00

Negotiations are integral to any business dealings whether you are an employee or an entrepreneur.And its an universal wish to get the upper hand at the negotiating table.One wishes to have the position of advantage and make more gains.This can be done provided one knows how to make it a win-win situation.Before you start negotiating ensure that it offers an advantage to you.To find out the advantages you need to first define the goals you need to achieve through the discussions.

Be clear on the compromises you are willing to make.You need to clearly define your core objectives, achieving this should be the primary motive of your negotiations.Plan ahead before entering any negotiations.Do your ground work, gather information,define your objectives and how much you are willing to give and take in the discussion.It is better to present your toughest stand at the beginning and present in a well-defined and logical manner.

It is important to understand what the other party wants and modify your own terms based on this.Most negotiations fail because one or the other sides fail to understand or infer what the other side wants. To avoid this listen carefully to what the other side is saying and clarify what they are offering.At the same time ensure that you get across your point clearly.Any negotiation can be successful provided it is based on trust,this will also ensure better and open communication.This trust has to extend even after signing the agreement because both the parties have to mutually believe that each one will deliver what has been promised.

If you are involved in a business negotiation you cannot just confine your talk to individual views alone,you also need to project your company’s views and demands.You cannot just put your individual views across to the other side.You also need your company's support, trust and resources to succeed.Be prepared to make compromises and concessions to the other side in your negotiations.At the same time be ready with a list of alternatives to counter disagreements from the other side and be prepared with some compromises.For instance, if the other party is quoting a high price, bargain for some benefits like payment installments.

Always have an alternative plan up sleeve before starting any negotiations.If your original proposal does not find acceptance, you can always present the alternative plan.If they still do not agree you can present your plan to another party.this gives you the freedom to walk out of any negotiations if it is not agreeable to you.After the discussions are over and you have reached agreement, re-confirm the terms with the other party verbally and later get a formal written agreement signed.This should also contain the deadline for the different terms of the contract.

Regarding your behavior during the discussion, be calm,cool and collected.Do not display any emotions that indicate excitement, anger or disappointment.Good preparation is half the battle won in any negotiation.Ensure that you know your lines well and the right way to behave.of course all this will come with practice and eventually turn you into a winning negotiator.

image credit : ernestoaguilar

How Do you plan to Negotiate in dealings ? ?

4 Important Factors That Put You On The Growth Path

2010-05-27T03:10:00.001-07:00

Whether it is a professional life or personal life, everyone wants more.This craving for more and better is the basis for growth and development.When an individual achieves something unusual, his success takes him and the society ahead.Others drive inspiration from him and attempt to achieve something even bigger.This is how we have been redefining what is possible.Lack of desire for more is usually seen as an abnormality,more so at the work place.When we remain in the same role for a long time, questions rise about our competence and track record.

Even if we deliberately choose to continue in the same role for some valid reason, the decision can sometimes damage future prospects.So the desire for growth is obligatory at work.Forcing an individual to grow is justified because it is directly linked to his personal growth.To grow in ones life professional or personal, one has to plan a strategy and execute it diligently.Here are some of the important factors that affect every individual’s personal and professional growth.

Willpower

The determination to learn and progress against any odds is vital for success.Challenges like financial status or lack of knowledge can make the journey strenuous.But one should not allow them to come in ones way.A through research always helps to clear the haze about what should be the next step. Being aware in the latest developments in the profession will give an insights to its requirements.Exploring ones talent can also help in deciding the future course of action.This awareness provides the required self confidence and a clear idea about the journey…

Self Assessment

This is the most important factor determines ones capabilities to achieve success.Honest self achievement prevents the individual from taking wrong decisions.It is necessary to get the clear picture of what to do and where we stands.Finding oneself not upto the mark should not make one to lose heart and give up efforts, but to motivate one to work harder and smarter.The next step is devising an action plan.With Focus and clarity the plan is more practical.And with a practical plan the path is smooth and its easy to achieve goals and become successful.

Flexibility

Flexibility helps an individual adapt himself to the current situation.By keeping one’s options open one can avail the opportunities come across.In fact, this way, one can even create roles to suit the requirements of the field.Guidance of seniors is invaluable in deciding further course of action.Discussing one’s plans with peers is also a good idea.But,final decision should be taken after careful evaluation of all the plans and advices received.

Credentials

Certifications are important for professional success.They are proof of one’s credibility.So, at each stage, an individual should consider earning a degree that qualifies for the next level.Sometimes experience gives the insight what knowledge and skills cannot. Working on different areas of the field can help understand its real requirements and discover opportunities.

With determination and hard work, anyone can grow to a level one desires.One’s current position and circumstances are not really power factors that can prevent one from attaining goals.It is only doubts about one’s abilities and lack of knowledge that can limit one’s success.With proper decisions these limitations can also be overcome.So start building confidence and achieve success..

image credit : lifedynamix

what Do You Think Of ? ?

Keys For Dealing With Critics

2010-05-20T00:10:00.001-07:00

Every idea and concept will endure criticism one or the other time before it is assimilated into practice. This criticism can be seen more in our professional life more than in our personal lives.We have to address every concern with patience,professionalism, to convince others.Handling these critics becomes easier when your approach to the subject and the process is objective.That is, do not attach your personal emotions to the idea or get affected by the comments of the critics during the discussion.At the same time you have to resist engaging in personal attacks to silence someone.

Self control, Clarity, and Objectiveness are the keys to dealing with critics effectively.The skills to professionally tackle critics may seem too difficult for some.But with practice it can be mastered.The process of dealing with critics or opponents starts with understanding and respecting others view points. Acknowledge valid points and then explain your way of looking at those points.

Talk in detail why you would like to differ from a perspective and how you plan to deal with potential problems that could crop up in pursuing the way you have proposed.Engaging people in criticising will help you to enhance and demonstrate your competence.So instead of being offended by criticism you should analyse it and devise the ways to tackle it effectively.here are some of the steps you need to follow to deal with critics effectively.

Lead under Fire

However unpleasant you cannot avoid facing and tackling criticism.The sooner you do it the better it reflects your capability to lead under fire.By avoiding ,you will prove yourself as incompetent or lacking confidence.Sometimes you may be sure of failing to defend yourself.Still, show up and prove that you are not afraid.

Transparency

When you handpick a few and confine the meeting to four walls, people will suspect your credibility.A good leader will keep the process transparent.Allow everyone connected with the issue to voice their views and do address each of them.

Poise Matters

What starts as objective analysis and evaluation of an idea or concept, could turn out to be a heated argument when you let the criticism affect your emotions.When you come across offending statements or criticism that is too sharp, breathe deeply and resist reacting right away.Speak slowly, deliberately with a low voice and sense of calm.the more control you have on yourself, the stronger is your influence on your opponents.

Admit ShortFalls

Criticism sheds light on your shortfalls. And when you are wrong admit it.Be Honest.This will impress upon your subjects that you genuinely did your best, are open to learning and down to earth.Contrary to what you may expect, it will increase trust others have on you and keep your future opportunities open.Do not be defensive.Admitting mistakes creates a sense of togetherness; once your critics notice that you are genuinely working for the solution they will join or support you in the cause.

Responses

Attack criticism with valid points.Keep the conversation professional and amicable.Act and talk diplomatically for getting things done your way.Occasional humor can keep in helping atmosphere cool.Appear relaxed. Keep smiling.This reflects your control and confidence.Do not keep repeating your argument or talk for a long time.And do nto jump to other topics.keep the discussion to the point, straight forward and brief.

So anticipate concerns, build good arguments and master self control to deal with criticism effectively.This will accelerate your professional as well as personal growth and helps to achieve success..

photo credit : tony.tbc.life

What is Your Way of Dealing with Critics ? ?

Be Aware Of P.R.A.I.S.E

2010-05-17T03:54:00.001-07:00

Every New born comes into the world crying.In that cry the mother sees I want to Live, the cry for survival & responds with feeding and contact for warmth.There is the perfect communication between the child and the mother.As the Child grows the physical self becomes less important and the abilities and skills become more important.His/Her image in the eye of others and self concern begins to develop.A healthy child develops sense of pride in herself for her individuality.This healthy growth may suffer on account of false assertions of self and futile defenses.

False Assertions and Futile Defenses

There are four ends in life which everyone seeks.Physical Prowess,Possessions,Prestige and Power in varying degrees.All these ends can be acquired in their own way without entering the competition,But most do it the other way.Further we want to appear good,intelligent,reasonable and laudable in the eyes of others.If we try this without insisting on others that they must accept us as we wish we are,there is no harm.But we strive to impress others to perceive us in a way which they cannot share.

Both competition with others and acceptance from others make us adopt ways of false assertions of ourselves.These ways are considered as P R A I S E which make us deceive ourselves in our life.

P - Putting Our self In Winning Situations

Some of us set us low goals as to make sure that we are always in a winning situation.We rarely stretch ourselves for fear of failure.Thereby we get a false sense of victory each time.But we will be unable to realize that we are not accomplishing big things in life and also not getting real success or happiness.The less we have this attitude the more we succeed in our life..

R - Recalling Past Unfinished Business

There are many people who talk of laudable tasks started in the past but discontinued for reasons beyond their control.They never admit that they lacked certain qualities like perservance to accomplish the task. You should think before starting a task wether it can be accomplished by you or not and consider all the pros and cons before jumping to it.You should be able to bear all the consequences that come in your way and should complete the task.

A - Associating With Important individuals or Groups

When these individuals or groups get name we are too glad to pose in the group photograph.Here we consider ourself successful and achieved the given task.But,in reality we have done nothing and we are living in a false belief of success saying to ourselves that we have accomplished some thing.

I - Identifying With Them

When we associate with the important individual, we find ourselves imitating them and identifying with them.It is like a two year old imitating his father wearing his shoes or glasses.he imagines he is daddy now at other times according as he wishes.This habit of imitating continues into adulthood with many people.But if you keep on imitating someone there is the danger of losing your own identity.So try to be yourself rather than imitating others.

S - Surrounding Self with YES men

This is some what opposite to the above two association and identifying.We manage to get a few yes men who make us feel important.When they praise us, we feel the prestige we want.However these false praises will one day push us into a deep well from which we cant come up.

E - Emphasising the Brighter Side of the Wall

This is the most common behaviour of humans.We do speak facts about us, but only partial truths. These are not at all facts because there is a vulnerable part of which we are afraid of showing. For example we may boast we are always punctual to a meeting, but do not say a word, of not saying a word in those meetings.

These are the ways we want to gain prestige, look good , intelligent, reasonable and laudable persons in the eyes of others.This is an aspect of our blind self. In fact they are self deceptions.they will not allow us to be worthwhile human beings.

image credit : designniac

What do you think Of PRAISE ? ? Is it helpful or Not ? ?

Focus By Discipline, Ensure Success

2010-05-13T00:42:00.001-07:00

A reason why people those who started their career early, fail to attain their goals is that they are not able to maintain focus till the end.They make grand beginnings but their enthusiasm levels keep falling with time.As a result the efforts they put in fall short and end up unsuccessful.In the modern world marked by compounding distractions, maintaining focus seems to be impossible.However if we let ourselves carried away by distractions, we can never succeed.Valuable time and efforts that we have already invested will go down the drain.The resultant failure leaves us angry,frustrated and dejected.And failing repeatedly dents our self confidence, making us incapable of setting and working towards our targets in future.Maintaining focus requires commitment,discipline and passion for the job.

To learn to maintain focus we should first understand what leads us astray from our Goals.There are factors that test our resolve in various dimensions.By identifying them,we can prepare to deal with them and reap the benefits.One Such factor is

Poor Knowledge About Ourselves

Quite often we do not know what we really want and what we are working towards.We often work very hard for something we are not passionate about.Over a period,we cease to work in the direction because we are not serious about achieving the target and so the efforts seem to inundate us.

The Best Way to find out whether we really want to achieve something is to start writing how we feel about it.We can write why we love a it and how it will change our life.When we read this after sometime, the content and emotions it generates will help us to realise what the goal means to us.Whenever we feel like giving up our pursuit we should read this.it will pep up our skirts and put us back on track again.Visualising the scenes of already achieving the goals gives enhanced results.

INERTIA is Another Factor that influences our focus

Inertia is an attribute of human mind.When habituated to think positive, we keep thinking positive.When habituated to think negative we keep thinking negative.So when we entertain thoughts that suggest that we could lose despite our efforts or that attaining the goal would not bring us the pleasure that is worth our hard work, we will slowly loose interest and stop working for it.So we should pay attention to what we are thinking.We should practise to resist negative thought and cultivate positive thinking.

Contrary to what most of us believe,having too many options is disadvantageous and distract our focus.When there are too many options, we have to be extra careful because among them are options that seem to be right for us,give short term happiness,entice us in disguise and those that are actually suitable or us.We have to analyse each and every option deeply to make the right choice.

We read several articles on how to improve focus.However we should keep each of them in mind but implement the one that is right for us.Whenever we are not able to take a decision, we can consider the suggestion of the one we trust the most.

Ability to maintain our focus on the specific task is essential to ensure its success.But this seems to be difficult for most of us owing to the different reasons.Once we carefully observe the factors that are causing us to lose our focus, we can work towards devising ways to tackle them..So start focusing on your goals and achieve success

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How Do You Stay Focused with your Goals ? ?

How To Actively Take Control Of Your Success - Steps To Success

2010-05-12T02:29:00.001-07:00

Success the most wanted need, for every person in life.To be successful in life, you must be clear about what success is.But however many are not able to taste the fruit of success.In order to taste the fruit of success,You must clarify your values and goals ,and understand that success is not just about hard work and no play. Taking control of success in your life will be always in our hands i.e. the way in which we plan and do our things.Here are the crucial principles which you need to follow to take control of your success..

Setting Goals

Setting your short,mid and long term goals is essential when its comes to creating clear criteria for success..Write down your goals in three main categories.

1. Things you want to be

2. Things you hope to do and

3. Things you wish to have.

Use the well known and most popular S.M.A.R.T formula to help you through the process of setting your goals.

S - Be Specific : State your goals precisely and clearly.Since these are created in specific,concrete terms,it is possible to see what is to be done,when it is to be done,how and where it is to be done.

M - Measurable : Make sure they are measurable.Ensure that you can obtain proof of your progress and also check that you are on the track.They set the performance standards.

A - Achievable Actions : State What tasks need to be carried out.They are challenging and reasonable in that you can implement and complete the task.

R - Be Realistic : Make sure your goals are a possible dream and achievable and also logical and significant for the overall task on hand..

T - Timing : Allocate a reasonable time span for each goal.

A realistic perception of the needs, capabilities and time needed to complete a task is easier to achieve a time management plan created using goals created and checked against the S.M.A.R.T. formula.further commitment to your goals is encouraged by successful results.

Prioritizing Key Issues

Make Sure that you prioritize your goals, your strengths and your actions.Recognize that you cannot excel at everything and prioritize accordingly.If necessary delegate those tasks or issues that do not complement your skills.Ask yourself “What am I really good at ?”, “Where do my Natural talents lie ?”, “What do i enjoy most ?”, and “what will help me advance my life goals and vision ?” Being strategic about key issues at work and in your life will make all the difference to achieve Success and a healthy balance.

Making A Success Statement

A success statement serves as a reference statement for assessing your success and also your work and life balance.From one that encompasses your values and purpose .Include your goals and roles.The statement will be your personal constitution by which you can measure your success,the balance of work and life.Try taking feed back from your trusted friends to improve yourself further.Let the statement inspire your decisions,influence your actions, and guide your life.Think about your life as a whole - Your family,friends,leisure pursuits,personal development and involvement in your community.realize that success is about all aspects of life and not just about work.

photo credit : flicker

Are You ready to take Control Of your Success or Let it go ? ?

Success Must Not Be At the Cost Of Happiness

2010-05-10T02:22:00.001-07:00

Happiness is a state of mind characterized by love,achievement and contentment.It can be physical or psychological or both; and is derived through our materialistic and philosophical approaches.When you chase happiness it eludes you.Joyfulness is the soul’s natural state and all you need is to eliminate everything that comes between you and your cheerfulness. Our happiness is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slow destructive little things.

The Happiness is wrecked in two different forms.

Firstly,some people,not being able to differentiate between oasis and water,loose present happiness working for future comforts.

Secondly and mainly, many people suffer from sleepless nights not with existing problems but visualizing future problems with their imaginary effects.

We all know the story of a donkey that was whipped by the washer-man for braying in the midnight on seeing the thief when the dog refused to do its job.The morale of the story is “one must mind one’s own job”.

Here is the another version of the story. When the donkey advised the dog to bark,it said “I’m taking rest.” The donkey that read many “success quotes” without properly understanding the real meaning said,“You Rust If you take Rest” and started braying.The washer-man caught the thief and appreciated the donkey.He realized that it is capable of doing night watching also along with its existing job of carrying clothes.

He dispensed with the dog and increased the donkey’s grass quota for additional strength to be awake all the night.The donkey was happy remembering another success quote “Dreams Require Effortless Sleep,but aim requires Sleepless Efforts.The more we do, the more we can do”. With increased pampering by the employer,the donkey worked happily.But as the years passed by, It realized that it was squeezed of its charm, health and family.But it was too late.

Here’s the morale of the revised story :

One Should certainly aim for promotion,identify his core competency,discover hidden virtues and abilities and utilize his talents.But above all one should comprehend what price he is paying for his SUCCESS..!the price of success should never be his HAPPINESS..!Happiness should come by achieving Success.But happiness must never be paid to achieve success.

If you work for 22 hours a day,you should be able to work happily.But not cursing your-self.Everything should be O.K at the end of the day.If it is not,then it is not the end.

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What do you Think Of ? ?

S.P.A.R.E Time is Not Free

2010-05-08T05:07:00.001-07:00

Time is our most valuable resource.Everybody has to manage their time to some extent wether it be at home or at work or both.The sequence in which you perform tasks on everyday basis has a profound effect on how much you get out of life. Most people have the capacity to manage their time better, and doing so makes the working day more productive and leisure time more fulfilling.By analyzing time on a regular basis, it is possible to understand the most efficient ways to use tome,both in and out of work place.There’s a saying that “Time Is Money.” But idle time doesn’t earn money.

Before thinking of day to day activities and time management techniques, we may consider for a while, time-structuring,is a socio-physical concept.Time is not purely physical,it is psychological.Here is an example.When we are engrossed in work we are not even conscious of how time has gone.when we are tired or bored we feel that time is moving slowly.These are the common experiences.Secondly we cannot engage in work always.We need some rest (i.e. Change Of Occupation).We move from one occupation to other.Some may prefer alternating between work and play.If we can combine work and play,we will have more time at our disposal.according to the concept of Time Structuring, all human beings have stimulus hunger like hunger for food.The stimulus hunger is satisfied through a number of ways.

Here comes the “SPARE TIME”. Spare time is generally taken as the free time which we use to relax. Every one must spare some time for positive self-occupation.Here’s The concept of SPARE.

S - Self Occupation

P - PasTime

A - Activity

R- Ritual

E - Encounters (Authentic, Dishonest/Games)

Self occupation is a situation in which you are not looking for outside stimulus(As i said above).When you are all alone not doing anything physically.You could be dreaming,fantasizing,thinking or brooding, introspecting or meditating what ever it may be related to your mind.You may get tired if it is negative or relaxed if it is positive.So spare some time for positive self-occupation.This makes you relaxed and gives you a new mood to work on with your daily routine.

Some time you will spare for Activities when you are doing something alone.I consider reading & writing as important activities one must engage in besides routine work.At other times we try to be in contact with other human beings for stimuli.

Ritual is a simple exchange of hello which satisfies the stimuli for hunger somewhat.A ritual can be extended one in some cultures.For example an elaborate welcome before engaging in a party or a meeting e.t.c.

PasTime is an extended ritual when people exchange several transactions just casually.These can deteriorate into games when people engage in gossip and dishonest transactions.these can be psychologically satisfying bet socially damaging.What is satisfying to all is authentic Encounters when people exchange ideas,opinions,thoughts e.t.c in an open and honest ways.The honest encounters are hierarchical, at the base level it is simply satisfying the stimulus hunger.As they become purposeful, problem-solving,finally reach the pinnacle,the collective consciousness and super consciousness.

Photo Credit : Zazzle

How Do you use your SPARE TIME ? ?

Why opinions without knowing facts should scare you more than Osama Bin Laden ?

2010-05-05T03:20:00.001-07:00

A seminar on self motivation is going on in the conference hall of a renowned hotel in a city .The motivator Narrates a story to the audience. A guy is deeply in love with a girl for a year and he proposes to her.She rejected his proposal for marriage saying she considered him a friend only.Later she loved another guy and their marriage was fixed. The Pitiable unshaven and gloomy ex-lover also attended their wedding.As he stood at the corner of the hall watching the proceeding, the unexpected happened.The bridegroom was bending to tie the wedding knot (In some religious traditions the marital relationship is confirmed after tying the wedding thread making three knots), but collapsed and died with heart stroke.

There was pandemonium & utter silence in the hall,but the bride recovered early,looked around and went to her ex-lover, “if you are still willing, we will marry here on the same dias now”.he could not believe but gladly accepted.She requested the priest to continue the proceedings.

Even before the speaker could hardly narrate the rest of the story the audience shouted “ NO.. How could she do that ? Ghastly Unethical”.

Then the motivator asked “So for how much time she should wait or what she should do to make it ethical ? ? ?”

One from the audience rose and said “At least thirteen days from her husband’s death” (Again In some religious traditions the rituals are performed for 13 days starting from the day of death).

Another one disagreed arguing that “The deceased has not yet tied 3 knots so he can’t be her husband”.

Another Girl rose and said “After the memories of love vanished, may be after a year or two she said.

The motivator smiled, “She forgot him in a second. Hence she proposed the other guy”.But nobody was willing to take it.

He continued “Now i present the other version of this issue.”

It was her 24th birthday.According to a will( a legal agreement) she inherits her uncle’s property if she marries before that date.this poor girl urgently needs money for her mother’s heart operation.She has to take a decision unwillingly”.

He Paused for a moment and asked “Now tell me whether she is correct ? ? ?” The hall was silent for a minute and the audience unanimously approved her decision.

Then the motivator said “Here are 3 things to think of”

1. “Who are we to decide whom and when she should marry ? ?”

2. Secondly “Never Fix other’s standards with your values.”

3. Finally “Never Form an Opinions without knowing the full facts.”

He concluded with a fine proverb about “perception” : “You can Complain Because Roses Have Thorns Below Them, or Rejoice Because Thorns Have Roses Above Them”

Now it’s the time to think about ourselves.Many of us (almost all) will form an opinion on an issue as soon as we listen it from someone.Neither we know what really has happened nor at least we are not present at the place when the event happened.How can we be sure that the person/the channel through which we get the news is genuine ? They will explain their own opinion and we will make an opinion based on their opinion.An opinion on another opinion. So before getting an opinion try to think of all possibilities and know the facts..

If we are comparing others standards with our values we are thinking that they should live according to our own wish.After all we are humans and Every person have their own morals,ethics and values.We should not compare others standards with our values.The things which seems right for you may not be the same for me.Who are we to think that the other person should lead his life according to our wish ? ?

But unfortunately many of us make the same mistakes again and again.So be wise and think twice before acting..

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What do you think of ? ? Please Share your Opinions with us . . .

Take Risks Confidently

2010-05-04T03:03:00.001-07:00

One or the other day everyone of us needs to take risks in our life or in the work we do.To make significant gains, we must take risks in life.Confidence and Courage are required, as is the ability to look in all directions before you leap.But those who can learn to think, act and build themselves have golden future.Confidence in yourself and in your abilities is an essential attribute.You need to develop self confidence to achieve success.But the problem is most of us fail to assess the risk and loose valuable time for opting it.Here are some tips to master risk taking in your career and life.

Have Courage

Believing in your own ability and being brave enough to risk being wrong is one of the important factors to success.When dealing with a risk try to think like an entrepreneur.Calculate wether a risk is worthwhile, and if it is,have the courage and self confidence to take it.You can advice all along the line.But the ultimate “GO / No GO” decision is yours alone.If you can take it confidently,then you can become successful.

Being Positive

Any decision from buying a thing to accept a new job has an up and a potential downside.When facing any risk, adopt the best mental attitude and concentrate on the positive potential,the Upside.But always be aware there’s a downside. Even the most gung ho person considers,even if subconsciously what will happen if the worst comes to the worst.If the downside is personally unacceptable, look for the ways of limiting the risk ideally for a fail-safe position.

Calculating the Risk

Don’t be mislead by the old investment maxim that says “The Higher The Return, The Greater The Risk”. In fact ,the upside on a relatively safe move can be great.However you must always calculate the risk before taking it, by doing a few simple yet effective sums.Remember ,too, that doing nothing may involve a hidden risk.If you do not take a decision, you might fail to make a breakthrough, either in your career or in your life.if you fail to spot this concealed risk, you will suffer the consequences.So, do your research and avoid taking action before you have all the facts.Remember, Never let an opportunity pass,but think twice before acting.

Do Your Best

You can strengthen your confidence by dwelling on what you do well.Do not compare yourself unfavorably with others, or suppose that others are judging you adversely.If you do feel inadequate in any area, train to improve your skills.Take pride in what you have done well and approach your tasks like a professional sports person. “Train to improve strengths and eliminate weaknesses , but recognize that doing as well as you can, and constantly raising that level,is the most you can expect.Don’t be afraid to seek feed back from others.Having received the feed back, act on what you have learnt.This is not the same as seeking the approval of others.You are not using the informed and critical advice to improve your performance and thus to feel better about yourself.Always expect to outdo others at whatever task you undertake.

photo credit : bizrite

How do you face risks and Achieve Success ? ? ?

8 Success Attributes Every Winner Possess

2010-05-02T03:07:00.001-07:00

Every Human being has at least one talent that can be turned into engine of success.Yet the best performance requires more than mere talent.It involves developing a number of important personal strengths,including determination,vision & confidence.The first & foremost key to become successful is to assess your self.Because you know what comes easily to you and these strengths can be developed fairly rapidly.Yet your natural powers may not be enough.To reach your full potential, you need to develop all the key attributes.For example lack of confidence is a general barrier .If you are someone who has feelings of low self-esteem, or you lack the courage of your convictions,you will have to work hard to maximize your self-confidence.Begin your self development by looking objectively at your abilities and where they most need to be improved.

If you are unsure how you rate in a particular area, such as your ability to lead, get objective feedback from somebody else.Once you have all the facts, you can create a vision where you want to be in the future.Draw up a mission plan of how to get there.

Attributes To Success

Ambition : Everyone of us will have an ambition.Write down the ambitions of your career and life.Plan how to achieve the high & stretching targets.This help you to focus on your goal and do the things in a planned way.Translate your ambitions into concrete time scales.

Vision : Form a clear idea of where you want to be and what you want to be doing in five years time ?You need to form a vision of significant but attainable aims.All the great people had a sense of vision & mission.They knew where they were going, what they wanted to achieve and had the power of direction to take them to their destination.you can mobilize the same power.Compare that future vision with where you are now.This shows the gap that must be crossed to realize the vision.never allow the problems of the present to make you forget that there is a future for which to plan.Review the vision periodically and revise as needed.

Confidence : Feel able to do anything that is needed now,do it well and master new abilities and tasks as required.This is possible only by being confident.

Ability to take Risks : This is one of the most essential quality to get succeeded in life and in job also.You need to believe in your own ability to judge risk as worth taking and to take your chances effectively.Consider the ups & downs of any decision.Don’t gamble but make the best judgment you can of the probabilities. i.e. aim for highest return at lowest risk.

Drive and Energy : Bring up your full mental powers to bear on an issue,to decide on the right action and see it through.This is nothing but concentrating on your work and doing it to the maximum extent of your capabilities.Be determined and perserve in reaching your goals.devote your drive and energy to planning as well as action to take steps to maintain the momentum.React forcefully to failure and reinforce success.

Self-Criticism : This is a factor which drives towards perfection and self-improvement in the work you do.You need to evaluate your own work.This helps you to improve constantly.make a habit of conducting post-mortem to analyze the reasons for error and remove causes.

Mission : Write a hard headed plan ,setting out what you must achieve to realize your vision.The plan must be timed and translated into numbers or hard facts.

Looking Ahead : It is far more useful to concentrate on goals achieved and future opportunities than on missed chances.If you miss an opportunity don't waste time on regrets, but examine why you lost it.

What do you think of Attributes of Success ? ? ?

Are You Defeated - Then You Are The Winner

2010-04-30T07:26:00.001-07:00

Inquisitiveness & Aspiration to come out with the best have been the pillars for our quest for success.Self-Motivation is the sheer force which pulls us apart from our ancestors.Many times in our life, when we are reviving old memories we get into a phase of nostalgia, we feel that we could have done better than what we have achieved.Be It thinking about a shattering school result,because of which you couldn’t get into your favorite stream or that single mark which could have made you stand in a different position. But thinking back won’t rewind the tireless worker - “TIME”.All we can do is to promise ourselves that we will give our very best in the future.

But Do We Really Keep up to our mental commitments ? ? ?

I guess 95% of the answers are in the negative.This is because of the creepy careless attitude which slowly enters into our minds.So, we need to pull up our socks & really motivate ourselves so that we can give our best in future.

Always remember “We can Control our fate by Controlling our Mind”. Self motivation is the need of the hour. Only we can control and restrict ourselves.It depends on us how we use our mental capabilities to the best of our abilities.Motivation is the will to act.It was once assumed that it needs to be injected from outside,but it is now understood that everyone is motivated by several differing forces.Self motivation is long lastig

Here are some tips on how to get yourself motivated..

1. You will end up reading many articles on self motivation,But you can’t see any change in your results.So, Don’t just read the articles ,rather digest each of them & learn to apply them.It will make a better YOU.

2. Don’t get depressed by Defeat in the earlier stages of achieving your goal.Because “ Defeat is the Ultimate motivator ”.Once you are defeated you have nowhere to go except to the TOP.Then the only thing Stopping you from achieving success is YOURSELF. So try to learn from the defeat and do the things in a correct way to achieve success.

3. A well known saying & Fact. “There’s no guarantee that tomorrow will come.So do the things today if possible now”…

4. “Intentions Don’t Count, But actions do” , So show in actions what you think of rather than having it in mind.

5. Ambition dictates achievement & thus success.So be sure to have big ambitions & strive to achieve them..

Well kept secrets about focusing on goals to Achieve success

2010-04-27T02:15:00.001-07:00

“The Greatest Results in life are usually attained by simple means & exercise of ordinary qualities.” In other ways the surest way to succeed is to determine not to fail.

With so many distractions & things that may be going on in your life, You can easily find yourself loosing focus on your goals & what you want to accomplish. Success is a matter of talent & opportunity.But much more of concentration & perservance.When You have set the goal before you,the next step is to make adequate preparations for its achievements.A half-hearted,Luke worm effort might take you a little way towards your goal but it will never get you far enough to reach it.

Things That help you to stay focused on your goals

Finish What You Started

You probably have heard the saying “So many things to do & not Enough Time to do them” though that may be true you still have the tome to complete them all.Especially if these serve as stepping stones to reach your goals.Just take one among the things you have to do & complete it until its done.When its done you will feel a sense of accomplishment & it will motivate you to move on to your next task.

Don’t Worry

Success will remain stranger to you if you play host to worries.This distracts from your goal.You will never be able to focus on the work you are doing.Never worry about a the task you are doing when you put your sincere effort into it.Success will be at your doorstep then.

Think Wise Before you Act

Do away with the habit of thinking too much or brooding.Make up your mind & then start acting on the work.Because The work what you do a part of yourself,an expression of what you stand for.The way you perform a task reveals the inner man in you.So don’t think too much & make it clumsy. If you learn to control your thoughts, you have taken a significant step towards success.Look upon your work as a means of expressing the best in you.

Understand Goal Will Take Time To Reach

You are not a human being of 20 years when you were born.It takes 20 years growing day by day & year by year to reach your 20th birthday.Similarly, “Everything in life,If it is worth,It takes time”.This also applies for the goals you set your self.Whatever goals may be,only thru hard work, determination & keeping yourself focused is the only way you will eventually reach your goals & achieve success.

Unlearn Yourself To Learn New

2010-04-24T22:18:00.001-07:00

The world is progressing very fast.A specialist becomes novice in no time unless he constantly updates himself.However for the learning to be productive one has to first unlearn the old.Unlearning is also a step in learning.It is not about wiping out the existing knowledge but recognizing the old knowledge as old & learning to make use of new knowledge.Unlearning is required to avoid committing mistakes.It’s needed to get your assumptions & inferences right & in line with the latest developments.Unlearning helps you to adopt a new way of thinking quickly.

In this information age what you learn need not be reliable & authentic.By learning to unlearn quickly,you can discard the unwanted knowledge soon to make room for the new.I know it sounds odd,but this will ensure your success in your professional life.Unlearning is necessary not just during technology updates,restructuring e.t.c but also for personal development innovation,creativity & other activities at the workplace also.

The Process

Unlearning is not an easy process.Because you have to convince yourself that your skills are no more relevant & your success principles no longer hold true.You have to work on resisting doing things in your old ways.Also you have to change your beliefs & approach.Sometimes,you cannot identify even your old practices so as to replace them with the new. Especially, learning in the form of inferences, assumptions, opinions & beliefs go unnoticed,but do influence the future decisions subtly.This is what makes unlearning process more complicated.So to unlearn something you have to first identify all those in your mind associated with that subject.Once this is done you can start unlearning..

Steps to Unlearn Yourself

Learn What’s Different

We always begin with learning what is similar or unchanged between the old & new.This way your mind would continue to be turned to the old knowledge.Also by the time you learn the similarities,you might be left with no time to learn the differences.Thus the process is slowed down or limited.Instead if you focus on new & tune your mind to use it the old will cease to exist in both practice & memory.

Be Open

Be open to the new knowledge.Don’t hold any preconceived notations about what you could learn.This approach makes the unlearning process smoother because it will help you to grasp the new knowledge sooner,which will push the old & practises to the back.

Seek Guidance

Unlearning is easy if you take the help of more knowledgeable and experienced people.They can help you identify the areas where you have to unlearn & how you can do it.

To unlearn something you should primarily have the intention to do it.You should device easier ways to do it ,practice them with sincerity & pursue the process with enthusiasm,but not as a burden.As you master the skill of unlearning you become more flexible & adaptable.But to master it you should have to realise the importance of continuous learning & willing to be a learner again & again…

Image Credit : calumet

Please let us know What do you think about unlearning ? ?

Insane - but true things that Cost to achieve Success

2010-04-23T18:09:00.001-07:00

Does it cost anything to achieve success ? ? yes,but not in matter or material.Surprised ? ? Everyone needs to pay some part of their life as rent to achieve success.In this fast busy world,we are paying a high price for confusing success with constant adrenaline,endless activity,all work,no rest & no play.The price we pay to achieve success is spending most valuable thing in our life.Its nothing but “TIME”.Success depends on the key factor, How we manage the time we have ? ?If we learn how to manage our time we can avoid falling into activity trap & wasting the precious time in our life.

Living Too fast - Detract from Quality

Many results today are being measured in terms of speed.Though speed is an important factor,it must not override everything.Speed of delivery must be always balanced with quality of work.Though you enjoy living life in the fast lane,realize that there are costs in terms of your health & well being.Also relationships get deteriorated if they are not given time & attention.Constant Activity is a trap that erodes effectiveness in both work & life.Make yourself active with moments of reflection so that you can achieve a sense of accomplishment.In an effort to achieve result there are chances we may damage a relationship,neglect what’s important,& cause unnecessary distress.

Workaholism - Losing up Important things in Life

We often see many of them saying that “I’m A workaholic” proudly.Just Ask them about their relationships with their family & friends.Probably these may be the words they have heard long ago..Workaholism is an escape from life thru work.It’s behavior that damages effectiveness,estrange families & impair health.A workaholic will ensure that they always have access to work,often confused as dedication.Be alert to symptoms of overload & focus on balancing your Work & Life.

Working Smarter - Managing Your Time Effectively

One of the another biggest traps that we are in today is the “busy culture”. Though no one wish/want to be in it everyone’s falling into it.The major problem with this is the habit of “busy-ness”.It follows the work ethic “Start early – Finish Late” that confuses constant effort with real effectiveness.Avoid this say keeping busy out of a sense of habit,duty or guilt because all these kill the effectiveness, creativity,morale & “motivation you are having in you.

Think about the saying Work Smarter , Not Harder”. i.e think about how you could be less busy & be more effective. If you are always busy you will not have the time to prioritize effectively.You may waste time on urgent tasks rather than important tasks.Prioritize tasks according to their importance not their urgency,so that you always stay focused.Always dare to put your priorities first, even when you are under pressure,so that you can build success.

What you are ready to Spend to achieve Success ? ?

Is Success A State Of Mind ? ?

2010-04-22T17:57:00.000-07:00

Success is not just a set of achievements of financial gain.Its an attitude.If this were not the case, then every high achiever would consider themselves successful.But,infact many rich,famous & accomplished people havematerial success but don’t actually feel truly successful or fulfilled.One must Understand that success is not just found in outer things but is located within ourselves.It is important to have a positive,proactive attitude so that you can live your life with purpose & vision.This will enable you to increase your effectiveness & achieve success & fulfilment.

Purpose and The Picture

We all know purpose is a reason for doing something which gives meaning to our work & life.It is one of the things in the life which you need to choose rather than expecting to find it based on what is important to you.for example if being a parent & a supportive colleague is what is important to you ? then the purpose may be to inspire others with your strength of character.Pinpoint your purpose so that you can have the real direction. Questioning your self with questions like what I'm passionate about ? , My unique strengths & talents ?, what motivates me ? e.t.c, help you to determine the purpose of life.

The picture is the overall vision of your work & life.It includes your goals,values & roles.You need to know how much time you need to Invest in developing your vision.Allow your imagination to free rein & picture your ideal life.visualize your ideal work & leisure time.Writing down the essence of your big picture will help you to drive towards your goal.Think deeply about each aspect of your life & work.This will help you reach a better understanding of your values & focus on your purpose.Cultivating success as a state of mind helps you to stop chasing false goals & expectations & start living your life focus on what matters to you.

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What Success means to you ? ? When do you feel you are Successful ? ?

Assessing Success

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Everyone wants to be successful in life.But only some of them are able to do so because they will have a clear idea on what they want & will be able to balance their work & life very effectively.To be successful in your work & life, you need to create a balance between the demands of your work & your life, you need to examine what success means to you.You can start it by clarifying your values,purpose,roles & attitudes so that you have something to measure your achievements against.We receive differing messages about success from various sources thru our family,friends,place we live in e.t.c. But ultimately success comes from leading a balanced & a fulfilled life.

Everyone work hard to gain success without knowing what it really means.you may climb step by step & reach a good position,but the important thing to note here is “are you fulfilled & satisfied by your work ?” for example an employee working in an office enjoys the job , but leaves the office on time so that he/she will be having time to spend with family.This is nothing but getting success in both work & life.Balancing your work & life effectively will definitely lead to get success in life.

The S3 formula of Success

The S3 formula explained by Robert & Ben is considered as one of the well explained formula for success.

The 1st S stands for Success – This says to form criteria of what success means to you.i.e. an outline of what will fulfil you.

The 2nd S stands for Strategy – This says to start forming a workable plan to achieve balance between work & Life.

The 3rd S stands for Synergy – This says make sure you focus on relationships & creative cooperation with those around you.

A successful person will always have a clear definition of success.To be successful start by clarifying your values.Schedule the time alone & think about what’s most important to you. For example like what kind of parent you want to be ? or what kind of a manager you want to be ? or what difference would you like to make in other people’s lives ? e.t.c. Put all your values at the centre of your life so that you can gain greater balance,vision & happiness in every area of your life.

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Let us know What strategies you follow for becoming successful ? ?